Tag, You're It!

I have not written a while here.  I usually say it's because I'm busy.  True.  But I think it's also because I was feeling lazy.  :)

However, since I was challenged to list down the 10 books that stay with me, I thought I'd head down here and list them down with a bit of snippets.

• Bible - Old Testament - Don't balk.  I did read it from front to back, twice.  As a young reader, I was fascinated with all of the different stories.

• The Silver Chalice by Thomas B. Costain - this was a gem of a book I found in our library.  My mom probably read the book before and it definitely was one of my most interesting read.

• The Guns of Navarone by Alistair MacLean - I saw the movie first and it got me interested enough to hunt down the book.  And from that first book on, I became a fan and avid reader of the author's books.  

• Brotherhood of the Rose by David Morrell - There was actually a TV mini-series that aired first before I read the book.  The book is always better but this is how I also discovered another one of my favorite authors.

• Kane and Abel by Jeffrey Archer - One great book that I've read multiple times. If you have not read this book yet, you are missing a lot.

• The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams - A friend of mine introduced this book to me and I ate it all up! It's very funny although the movie does not give the book any justice.

• Eragon by Christopher Paolini - The book that I hastily bought for our travel from Rome to Florence.  It quite surprised me as I didn't think I would like it a lot.  I love the whole series.

• Ice Station by Matthew Reilly - read the book and you'll find out why I love the author and the main character in this book

• The Other Boleyn Girl by Philippa Gregory - This was not considered a historically accurate book and has a lot of negative reviews.  But I didn't read it to understand history but to enjoy the book. It definitely delivered.

• Dracula by Bram Stoker - I've read this book several times already and consider it a very good read every time

My list may seem commercial for some but I stand by this list.  They are some of the most enjoyable books I've ever read.  I agree that the number ten seems a bit limiting as there are a few other authors/books that I would love to bring into the circle. But if I start including almost all of my favourites,  I would probably reach more than 50 and that would still not be enough.  So for now, let's stick to ten.  

Thanks Becky!


*note: image courtesy of The Bookworm Net

Confessions of A Mom

Someone asked me, in knowing the difficulties I know now of being a Mom, would I do it again?  And without a single heartbeat in between, I answered yes.  I would never trade the happiness that my daughter provides me for the luxuries that I no longer enjoy.  

I believe that one cannot say you have loved selflessly until you've felt the unabashed feeling of loving your own child.  Imagine holding a child who, in their young lives, have nothing tangible to give and yet provides you with the a most rewarding feeling.  Whose smile can break your heart for the sweet joy it brings.  Whose tears can echo similar tears welling up in your eyes.  

When they fall, they cry and you are there to support them and help heal them.  When they are hungry, they cry and you are there to feed them.  This little person who looks up at you with love, who does not have any prejudice for the kind of person you are.  This little person who loves you just because.

But raising a child is not easy.  I used to think that if I end up not marrying anyone, I'd try a hand at raising a child.  Boy, was I fooling myself.  It's difficult enough as it is when you've got a partner to help you.  More so I think when you do it on your own.

This is not like having a kitten or a puppy that you can return or send away when you end up not liking it.  Having a child is for life.  Everything change.

Your priorities change.  Your plans change.

Where you used to be planning for that trip in Europe with your partner, now you plan how to save enough money for your child.  You'll probably still plan for a trip but now the venue would be geared towards what the children will enjoy versus the places in your bucket list.

Before, you can stay outside of the house for a long time, not really taking notice of the hours as they tick by.  But now, an hour after running personal errands, you can't wait to go back to your child.

Your patience would be tried and tested.  To the fullest.  Again and again.  If from the start you're someone who is impatient by nature, all that must change for your child.  And even if you pride yourself as someone whose patience goes a long way, you know you'll snap every once in a while no matter what you do.  You just can't help it.  This little bundle of joy, this cute little child can sometimes be the devil in disguise.  Oh yeah.  They'll bait you to no end, and that without them knowing they're making you boil already.  But at the end of the day, you chide yourself for losing it over the most mundane things.

So you see.  The life of a Mom is not easy.  But don't be discouraged.  It may not be all pomp and glory but there's always a reward.  All your stress and trouble goes away when you get a fierce hug from their little arms and a whispered 'I love you' at the end of your day.  So yeah.  I am a Mom and I love it!

3WW: Authentic Enlist Phobia

Recently, I was asked whether I think I'd like to go higher up in the corporate ladder, take on more responsibilities.  I'm sure I can handle it albeit with difficulty.  I may also not be perfect for the role, but if I set my mind to it, I probably can do it.  The question is, is my heart in it?  See, I am an authentic person.  I find it hard to lie.  I can if I need to but it's not in my nature.  So you see, it's difficult for me to hide if I don't like someone.  For me to hide my phobia of a particular person.  Thus, it may be a detriment for my career if I need to rub shoulders with folks I don't particularly like.  Don't get me wrong.  These people probably don't like me too, so the feeling is mutual.  But they would be better adept in hiding that fact than I will ever be in my lifetime.

I can enlist the help of others to get around this fact.  But in life, real or corporate, you need to learn to depend on yourself and not to be too dependent.

I am not a perfect person.  I know that.  You know that.  And if you haven't figured it out yet, I embrace that fact.

My generosity is quite known, so much so that there are tendencies for some to exploit or abuse that.  In most cases, I don't mind.  As long as I can give it, I will.  However, do realise I am a generous person, not a dolt.  I know when someone's pulling my strings.  If I allow it, don't think you're getting one up on me, I probably allowed it just because.

But there's a side of me that also gives people the crazies.  Something that drives other people insane.  Or so frustrated that they just want to scratch my face out of irritation and be done with it.  That's one kind of reaction I always seem to get.  And seriously, I don't understand it.  Moi?  I am a nice person, see.  Look at the many times I've posted about that same topic.  And with so many post about me being nice, then that only means it's true, right?

So.  We've established the facts:

1. I am authentic 
2. I am not perfect
3. I am generous to a fault
4. I am nice
5. I drive people insane  

For people who genuinely believe in # 1, thank you.

For those who falls under # 5, don't be a cry baby.  Go back to # 4.  And if you still don't get it, read # 2 and # 4 again and again until you fall under my spell and finally believe # 1.