Obsession

How does one say that you love someone when the person that you claim to love does not respect the person that you are?  Accepting a person's short coming is one thing but blatantly accepting the malicious and disrespectful activities of a person, especially when it is aimed towards your family, not just you, is just plain blindness.

I don't consider that love.  I consider that obsession.  

An obsession to make things right.  An obsession to correct something or someone that you know cannot be corrected.  How do you change the stripe of a Zebra? You don't.  You can paint it all red or white but in the end, the stripes will always remain.

You and me against the world.  That's their motto.  And it is literal in its meaning.  Disregard everything that everyone else says.  Even if you are a witness to the disrespect to your family.  You still continue to hold on to the person who instead of bringing new members to the family is splitting it apart, I just don't get it.

It is not my fight but I cannot help but to observe the futile path of this relationship.

I wonder how long it will last and how much more pain he has to suffer before he finally understand that it's just not meant to be.  I guess some people just have to learn their mistake by living the coerced life that they want.  Maybe in the end the Zebra will change its stripe.  I just won't hold my breath for that.

Grrrrrr

I was trying to manage the draft posts in my blog and inadvertently deleted two of my published posts.  Nice going!  :)

Noise

The other day, I was reading while in the train when suddenly loud heavy rock music started playing. I realized it's from this guy who don't seem to care that no one really cares about his music except him. He is probably thinking he's so cool with his music and all but he is just plain annoying.

After a few stops, he took the empty sit on my left. So I had to do my reading with loud music. Then someone came in from one of the stations along the way, playing loud music as well and what do you know, he sat on my right. So there I was, with two guys playing loud heavy rock and still trying to read through my book.

The only consolation I have is that one day, when they are older, they will have a problem hearing because they have managed to damage their eardrums. That's what I think should be their just Karma.

The Harsh Cold Reality

We read about it in newspapers and dispassionately listen to similar stories in the news. But I guess when it happens to you, it takes on a different mood, a different color and it comes down like a big dose of harsh cold reality.

I've always felt safe here in Singapore. I've been here more than 7 years and have never experienced anything like it before. So when it did happen to me, I felt like a stranger watching an event unfold to someone else. I felt like a 3rd-party observer who still can't believe it happened.

I was staying at home alone as both my housemates are in Manila on work and/or vacation. As I arrived back in Singapore last Sunday, my sister Mary was on her way back to Manila.

On my last birthday, I celebrated it like any other year. Dinner with family and friends. Nothing exceptional, except for the company. After my birthday dinner/drinks, I took a cab as it was really late and I arrived at our block at barely before midnight. I went up to the 5th floor, took out my keys but before I even tried to open the doors, I noticed our wooden door was broken and splintered. The doors were opened so I went inside and stood at the entrance of the house and found the lights blazing in the living room. I felt cold all over and knew I've been robbed. What's funny was I looked at my desk at the living room and still found my laptop intact so I was a bit confused if there was a robbery.

With panic in my voice, I called my boyfriend, my twin sister and the police in that order. Unable to get my boyfriend, I sent him a 911 message hoping he'll call me as soon as he sees the message. My sister kept me company on the phone as I stood alone, panicked and distraught at the lobby of my building. I managed to call the police and report the incident and kept my sister on the phone again while I wait for the police to arrive.

It was one of the longest night I remember. With the police, I entered the house and realized all my jewelries and watches are gone. Including their boxes. I also noticed my passport missing after a while.

Most of the things that were taken are replaceable. Except for one or two heirlooms that were gifts from my mother and was a gift to her from my grandmother.

I kept on thinking that if I had decided to go home early, either the robbery would have not taken place or they could have still done the deed with me inside or I could have arrived at the time when the robbers were still inside. And I just don't know what would have happened if the latter two happened instead. I also thought about the week before when I was in Manila and my sister Mary was alone in the house on her own.

So in a way, I am thankful because it happened when my sister was not home. Or when no one was there to be harmed. Material things can be replaced but the lives of my loved ones are more important.

Right now it seems like a distant memory but it only happened 3 days ago. I still think about it every now and then but I knew it's futile to feel helpless or feel distraught by it as I don't think I'll get any of the items back.

But it now makes me feel unsafe in a country where I thought a person can live on their own without any worries. I guess that proves once again the usual statement you see outside that says "Low crime does not mean no crime". How true.

What infuriates me is the fact that someone was inside my house rifling though my stuff, violating my personal space. That was more frustrating than losing the material things I lost.

The people who did this to me might have a celebration for getting a lot of things from me but life works in mysterious ways. I still believe in Karma and these people who did this will not have a good life ahead of them in the long run.

Right now, this event just makes me more paranoid and suspicious. I don't want to be affected much by this event but subconsciously, a part of you will always be on the look out, always suspecting things that are not suspect. I won't be paralyzed by this event and make me stop living my life. But I guess I will never take for granted the relative safety that I feel here in Singapore and assume that nothing bad can happen to me. Because it just did when I never thought it would. So again, one needs to remember, "Low crime does not mean no crime."

The Big L

Warning. Spoilers ahead!

Is it really possible to be in love with two people?

I understand that a person's heart can be big enough to love a lot of people but to be in love with two people at the same time? I just can't fathom it. Maybe I am a person who is monogamous in nature so I find the idea a bit absurd.

Now, you're probably wondering where this is coming from. This is from my irritation from the character in the book I am reading. Yes, the infamous Bella. For someone who is supposed to be soooooo in love with her vampire, someone who felt she died when he left, she was not acting like someone who is really in love. How can she say that she's also in love with the enemy? I know that's probably just done by the author to put a better twist in the story but come on! Is that for real?

Is there anyone out there who have been in love with two people at the same time? Wouldn't you have to fall out of love from the other before falling head over heels into the other?

The idea is just crazy for me and I cannot understand it. That's why I'm irked with this book and with the silly heroine. I want to tell her to get over it already. Either you choose the cold one or the furry one. You can't have both. What the !?!?!

Luck has nothing to do with it

Last Sunday, I experienced a most unlucky day. And you know the saying that things come in threes? My bout of unlucky events was like that.

First, there was the slide. I woke up early to see my parents off who were on their way to Bulacan. I can't get back to sleep anymore so I decided to clean the house. Things were going okay but while I was walking to get a new pail of water, I slipped and hit my left arm. A big black bruise appeared a few minutes after.

Then there was the door incident. I was at my bf's house visiting and on my way out to get something from the car, the house door suddenly closed and hit me. Ouch! A big gash appeared on my left ankle and there was a lot of blood. What the heck!?!

Lastly, I was placing a hose into one of the faucets in one of my bathrooms when water suddenly started spurting and drenched me all over. I broke the faucet! I had to close the water supply to the whole house and wait until the morning before it was fixed. And I had to endure the jokes about how I stepped on the faucet causing it to break. Aiyoh.

Thankfully, my bout of accidents stopped after that. I continue to cross my fingers and hope that it stays that way.

Happy Christmas everyone!

My Shoes Hate Me

The other week, my pretty green shoes had me walking unevenly as I lost my left shoe's heels. It was one of my really chic and nice shoes but on the cheaper side. And one of my friends was laughing at me for buying cheap shoes and end up discarding it after one usage. I've stopped buying poor quality shoes but I thought this one was okay. The design and color was great and it was difficult for me to find something similar on the branded shoes here. Lesson learned: stop buying cheap shoes!

Today however is a different story. I was wearing my Bonia shoes. And it is definitely not on the cheap side. I always use the stairs beside the escalator in the underpass for walking up or down on my way to and from my office in ORQ. So today was no different from my usual routine. I was almost at the top of the flight of stairs. I was on a conference call for a status meeting when I suddenly realized that I'm falling! My shoe somehow got caught on my pants and made me lose my balance.

My left knee got the brunt of my fall but thankfully I managed to shield myself from any further harm. But as I tried to stand up again, I felt a tremendous pain. A lady tried to help me but I told her I'm okay. No matter how many people saw me fall, it did not even register because my mind was on the pain I was feeling on my knee.

My left knee was totally bruised and black and it was painful to bend my knee. The doctor gave me two days of MC but of course I was still working at home because I am going on vacation next week.

So you see why I think my shoes hate me? They must be cursed or something. Maybe they were enchanted by an ugly witch who hates me.

Anyhow, I don't think I'll be using the stairs anytime soon.

Christmas without Peppermint Mocha

After a very long time, I saw myself sitting at one of the tables outside Starbucks coffee at Bugis. I was excited as I went inside to make my order. It's almost Christmas so the peppermint mocha must be available by now. Alas, as I scan the menu, it does not seem to be available. So I waited for my turn and asked the barista if the drink is available. They are not serving it this year. What!?!?

Christmas without peppermint mocha. Is it the end of the world?

Okay, I'm being melodramatic. But really. Christmas without my favorite jolly season drink.

I don't know why Starbucks decided to go without the peppermint mocha this year. I need to know why. Someone please tell me why.

photo courtesy of Pax Romano's Rambling

How to cut the queue effectively

We had dinner at Pasta Mania in Funan before the Parokya ni Edgar show. I was in front of the line waiting for an available queue to open up when suddenly an Auntie behind me said to her husband "Here, take a look at the pasta you want". All the while I thought they were really just going to take a look at the pasta and go back to the back of the queue. However, when the queue near the pasta they were looking at suddenly opened up, they took the queue disregarding everyone else who were there first. What the!?!? Some people here really have no manners. Grrrrrrr.

Huh ?!?!

This morning, I was amazed again about how some people can be so clueless. I went to the pantry to fill my water bottle. I was just about to open the hot water tap when an Auntie suddenly cut in front of me and used it herself. I was so amazed by the audacity of the Auntie. Was I invisible? I think not. I then said "Excuse me" after which the Auntie looked at me like I was crazy. I think she felt she was there ahead so no matter if she was doing something else before, if she wants to be ahead, she won't care about whoever else is there.

Funny. And here I thought she went to college. Maybe not.

Go back to elementary school Auntie! Maybe the teachers can give you some much-needed lessons in good manners.

Grrrrrrrr

I am pissed. With people who I have trusted and helped only to find out later that my generosity was abused. I am generous to a fault. I don't mind helping friends and family because I am wired like that. What I hate, hate, hate is when my kindness is taken for granted and abused by people I trusted.

There are those who would only allow a relationship between my parents and their grandchildren if money passes hands.

There are those who would not honor their obligation and put up a lot of excuses. What's doubly irritating is when I find out that they can snag new stuff (and have the gall to blog about it) but would ignore you to death if you ask them about their obligation.

I am generally a nice person. But once you abuse my trust, don't expect me to understand your plight. I won't care so don't tell me stories anymore. Go talk to someone who would listen.

And believe me. Those who usually abuse my kindness always get into bad Karma. I don't ask for it, but it happens.

No matter how good you think you are, you're nothing to me now.

Go cry me a river. Expect me to watch while I see you drown.

Beware of Hooligans at Sim Lim Square

My sister Mary wants to buy a PSP slim for her daughter. To make sure she doesn't get hoodwinked by anyone in Sim Lim, I accompanied her to give my advise.

The first shop we came to was the one just before you go in the mall. We asked for the price and we were told $170! I was incredulous! I said, 'why?' and the guy laughed at me. He said 'It's cheap! How much do you want it to be?'. Then he brought the price much lower to $150. He will even modify it for free. But I am not one to buy at the first instance without checking the price from other stores so I told my sister we'll just go back.

We went from one store to another and have never found another one whose price is better or equal to the first one we saw. I was getting dizzy as well so I told my sister to just go back to the first store and buy from there.

This time, we were told, the price is $150 but if we want the modified one, it will cost us $200. So I said no. Then the other guy say, okay, I'll modify it for you for $150. I said, okay. I'd like to see the unit first. I asked if it was new and he said it just came from the box. I guess the evasion in answering the question should have warned me. Then I was inspecting the unit trying to see if it has scratches, etc. The guy was adamant that we pay up the money before they modify the unit and give it to us. I was pissed because I was still not done with inspecting the unit and he was demanding money! So I said to my sister to leave.

We looked at other more places and asked some more. One guy told me a price of $290 and I said it's too expensive. The guy asked, how much do you want? I said some stores told us $150. Then he explained that when you buy from these stores, they will ask you to hand over your money first but they won't give you the unit until you've bought additional accessories costing between $80 - $100+.

Another shop we went to said those shops selling between $150 - $190 have refurbished units but they won't tell you that.

So I lost my faith in any of the stores in Sim Lim and I told my sister we should just go somewhere it's safe to buy. Like shops in Funan, etc.

One of the store owners we have spoken to in Sim Lim said that a lot of the Filipinos / Filipinas have been fooled into buying the cheaper priced PSP. The money will change hands but the unit will not be given until you buy some more. And because the money is already with them, you have no choice but to give in to their demands.

From the start, I knew there was something fishy. Good thing I was not one who trusts easily and will always look at every angle especially if the price seems like a give away.

Anyhow, beware of these scams happening in Sim Lim. Be sure to buy in good and known stores or you just might find yourself buying a refurbished unit with unwanted accessories to boot.

F*cker Is The New Excuse

The MRT train nowadays is always full. In the morning, the number of people who alight at Tanjong Pagar and Raffles Place is a lot and can be overwhelming. So I have gotten into the habit of staying near the trains doors when we get to Tanjong Pagar to make it easier for me to get out.

This morning, I found myself on the way to the train door at the Tanjong Pagar stop. I always try to walk at the back and follow everyone else who are going out to avoid blocking anyone who wants to get out. But it was different this morning. I unknowingly hindered a man's exit on the same station.

Instead of the usual 'Excuse me.', I actually heard 'F*cker' shouted from behind. I was surprised and incredulous. The speaker was an elderly Singapore uncle who in his corporate outfit should be educated enough to know how to say excuse. It did make me think twice about the kind of education he got as he seem to have missed critical lessons in manners.

What is the world coming into?

Raindrops Keep Fallin' On My Head

Ugghh! I'm on vacation today and tomorrow but it's raining! And what's worse is that the next few days have the same prediction for the weather. Aaaarrrggghhhh!



Here I thought I'd be able to bring my camera for some photo shoot. Instead I'm here at home watching the rain. Dare I go out? What? And risk getting my camera wet? No way!

Rain rain go away,
Come again another day....

Pop-up

An advert of mine was declined in Entrecard. I was declined due to pop-ups from my site. I had to delete all of my widgets one by one to see which one is causing it. I even thought it was because of the new template I installed.

Finally, I found out that it was due to the comment box widget that I installed some time back. Because I have my pop-up blocker on, I never realized that I had one.

Darn! I hate pop-ups. So I brought down the comment box widget. And the pop-up is gone.

OMG

Oh my. It seems the Philippines is again in the news due to the the stupid work of a few doctors and nurses in Vicente Sotto Memorial Medical Center (VSMMC) in Cebu. Apparently, a patient went to the hospital to get a foreign object removed from his rectum. The patient was unaware that the whole operation was being filmed. The video was put up in youtube and caused an uproar. You can hear the nurses and doctors in the background, mocking the patient and laughing. There were a lot more people in the operating room than those already named in the news. A part of the crowd was just there jeering and using their film cameras to record the whole event. They thought they were all brilliant.

The operation itself is unusual but who gave these doctors and nurses the right to abuse the trust that was given to them by their patient? They are being paid to assist him and yet they ended up being the one to cause him personal pain and humiliation.

I was clueless of this event until a few days back when the topic came up during a lunch discussion. I was horrified when I heard of it. How can anyone be so dumb to do something like that? It is career suicide.

My sister is a nurse and it pains me that her profession is marred by the work of a few thoughtless individuals.

I hope the involved doctors and nurses in VSMMC get their just reward.

Things I Missed For Not Watching...

image from americanidol.com

I have not been able to watch American Idol for some time now and so I was surprised to learn that my favorite Michael Johns was eliminated. What the !?!?

Oh well. AI7 ain't as fun to watch anymore. Although Ayesha is still there, her appeal to me is now lost. I have never been a fan of David Archuleta so all the praise being sang for this boy is lost on me. He's got a good voice but after some time, it just seems boring to me. Ha ha. I will probably piss a lot of his fans for saying that but to each his own, yeah? I am entitled to my opinion.

I wonder if there's anyone else to watch for in AI7. It's just not as exciting to me now with MJ gone. Well, let's wait and see.

What The !?!?

I was so irked yesterday morning with an Auntie at the MRT. Here I was sick and red-nosed and trying my best to avoid infecting others by regularly covering my nose and mouth so I don't spray the germs if I sneeze or cough. As I have a runny nose, I had to blow my nose every now and then inside the MRT train. The Auntie beside gave me a dreaded look like I suddenly sprung two heads. Then she moved away from me and not even doing it discreetly. What a b*tch.

I was thinking of leaning closer intentionally but I changed my mind because I don't want to stoop to her level. Ha ha.

I woke up with a fever but I am now feeling a bit better but still very weak. I think I need a break.

A Stranger to the Trash Can

There something inherently wrong with a few people here. Imagine a trash can about 5 steps away and yet you'd see a floor full of litter and paper flyers all over the place. How difficult is it to take that extra 5 steps to throw the paper into the trash can! What's worse is that the admin of the building decided to put this litter box just beside the mail boxes, just at the bottom. But did the people put the trash there? No! They still insist on throwing the paper anywhere they want.

In the morning, if you happen to get a hold of a newpaper, you'll always know that there is an ad insert because of the numerous flyers all over the MRT walkway. I mean, can't these people hold the paper and throw it when they next see a trash can?

It's just so frustrating that people do not know a simple thing like throwing in the trash can. I'm wondering if they are carelessly throwing the paper away because there is always someone to clean it up. It just seem so rude though to be throwing papers anywere you want just because you think someone else is there to clean up after you. What a lazy attitude.

I do hope those who allow papers to litter the different places here in Singapore get a chance to be acquainted with a trash can. Much better if it's through their head inside one. Maybe they'd remember to throw trash correctly next time.

Back In The Gym

After a year of not utilizing my gym membership, I decided to go back again earlier tonight. It was not because I felt I was wasting my money for not using something I already paid for. It was more because of the glaring 2 kilos I gained this 2008.

And as usual, I got something more than I bargained for.

Inside the steam room, one of the girls that just went in suddenly blurted, “It’s hot”. And I was like, “Hmmmm, it’s a steam room honey! It’s supposed to be hot! What the !?!?”

Then after a long wait for an available shower booth, I was lucky enough to get one where the lady that just came out smelled like a person who was dipped in a tub full of onion and decided to stay there for a week. I almost puked right there and then and I was thinking maybe I should go out again and wait for another shower booth to become available. Problem was the line was really long and I didn’t want to wait anymore. It was just horrible that after being in the shower for so long, she still did not manage to get the stink out of her. Really! There is such a thing as soap and shower gel girl. You need to get yourself acquainted with one of them. And fast!