Valentine 2011

There were a lot of years in between my last serious relationship and my marriage. A lot of years when I sometimes want to avoid February because of the almost accusatory look I receive from couples when they see you celebrating Valentine with your girl friends. More so when you don't celebrate it at all! Sometimes, the accusatory look can turn into a pitying look. As if not having someone in your life during Valentine's Day is a crime.

I will not settle. This is what I used to tell my sisters and my friends. Why would I allow myself to be in a relationship just for the sake of being in one? I cannot be so petty that I'd allow society to dictate what I should and should not do. You've got to love your self enough to know that going into a "dummy" relationship is also cheating yourself out of a possibly great one.

But I guess that's the problem sometimes. The world can be so big that you might not meet the person that's meant for you at all in your lifetime. And wouldn't that be a shame?

I guess I lucked out.

Here are some excerpts of what I wrote in my diary in different times of my life:

October 1999
Everyday, I live with the knowledge that the right person will come at the right time. I know it like I know that I need to breathe. I am not afraid that I'd grow old alone and lonely. I have faith in my partner. I know that one day he'd find me. And then I won't be afraid to love anymore.

June 2001
I miss the giddy feeling you get when you're in love. And what's more glorious than knowing that the man you love loves you in return? I want to have someone look at me like I'm a gift from God. Someone who knows me well but still loves and accepts me just the same. Someone I can wake up to in the morning and see the sun reflected in his eyes, the promise of the day in his smile.


I'm glad I waited and did not settle.